schema therapy

Jeffrey E. Young, PhD, a cognitive psychologist and clinical researcher at Columbia University Medical Center says most people follow a pattern in their life laid out from early childhood. These "schemas" shape our relationships and life choices. People tend to relate to one or more of these 18 schemas. Which schema or schemas sound familiar to you?


These are mine..

Emotional Deprivation
Most of the time, these patients haven't had someone to nurture them, to care deeply about everything that happens to them or someone who was tuned in to their true feelings and needs.

Entitlement
Those who hate to be constrained or kept from doing what they want or feel that they shouldn't have to follow the normal rules and conventions other people do.


Pretty true indeed..


Try this quiz if u think u have one..
Click here...

of anger and hurt and new beginnings..

just when you start giving in and opening up again
and allowing yourself to be vulnerable... and foolishly
thinking perhaps just perhaps that somebody will
understand me

BAAAM!

i am so wrong..

people still don't get me.. correction there are people who do -
like my darling nabila.. who knows me the best and
NEVER EVER judges me for anything and well God is not
counted HE is not human.. but the rest, the humans..

my so called good friend..

know not a shit about me.. only make me feel worse than crap for
opening up...

me immature??

i have loads of shit going on at home.. i have to help carry some if not all..
its tiring to be Ms.StrongWoman all the time.. i need breaks.. i need
people who will lend a ear, people who wont judge me..

who will just listen to me being a girl, to cry for help.. since i can't
do that at home...



what's wrong with that??

had enough

im done.. FINALLY

everything does happen for a reason..

thank you God..
it may seem like my worst christmas ever..
but i think its gona be the best...

love, life, etc

im back to square 1 nw questioning what is love?
the 4 letter word that seem to have caused me a lota mixed feelings
throughout my life..

no, not the kinda family love.. its the other kind the boy-gal kind..
how do you know if love still exists?
how do you know if love can prevail?
how do you even know that what you're feeling is actually love?

argggh.. matters of the heart just irritate me soo much these days..
its not all about me here.. its also the ppl close to me who seem to be
triggering these thoughts of mine..
i just wish i could just shut down the heart.. and focus on everything else..

but no... i cant.. well technically if i shoot my own heart i can
but then again you never really know if your heart actually stops having feelings
even after death...
who knows anyways...

its funny i used to dislike Grey's Anatomy cause i felt that matters of the
heart were exaggerated there.. but now.. i could relate to it.. funny..

................

the same stuff really seem to be happening to me again and again..
and this only makes me wonder WHY??!!
it cant be coincidences its too much.. it cant always be them
maybe its ME..? seriously...

perhaps i should do something bout this before it creeps up to me
before it blossoms then ill be stuck..
should we prevent something that we feel is bound to happen or should
we just give in to nature to take its course although if this happens
its gona hurt badly...
what is the answer to that??

i really wana know.. if there is an answer.. i hope and pray to find it...


*an emo post...

Get to know him better...

Abraham Lincoln once said...
"I don't like that man. I'm going to have to get to know him better"


that's a real positive attitude from the 16th president of the United States.. and a good example of what most people today should follow..
i mean seriously.. people these days based everything on 1st impression.. how true is 1st impression??

does ones look 100% tells evrytg about that person?? i mean if that was the case then the rate of crimes wouldnt be as high as it is today as every one could tell that by a person's look that that person is a criminal! soo run!!!!

back to reality.. WE ARE NOT LIVING IN THAT WORLD! that world in not existent.. imaginary indeed.. therefore by simplying judging ppl based on their distinct look, race, religion, gender, and even age is plainly UNFAIR!

we should ALWAYS get to know the person better before even making the slightest remark of that person...

so take a pause n appreciate the words of the late Abraham Lincoln and the old saying... 'never judge a book by its cover'



from today onwards i will try my best to get to know every single person that i seem to not like at 1st instance.. i could make a big difference.. so can everybody...

anew..

my dear blog has been abandoned for 3months! poor thing! looks like its about time to revamp my blog.. YES NABILA and REBECCA! haha

ive been busy busy.. for the past few months! exams.. studying n all.. but unfortunately i still didnt do well.. in fact i did badly.. i had to resit.. hopefully my resits would be much better.. 2nd year i really have to work on my studying skill.. Tony Buzan better help me out...

oh yeah i bought this book Tony Buzan's study handbook... ive been using it to study 'effectively' for my resits... hope it works.. studying for law has taught me a lot.. its absolutely unlike A'levels n nothing at all like high school.. to me now.. its no more about memorizing.. its about understanding what u learn n applying it... its definetely easier said than done... well.. isnt life all about learning...

back to revamping my blog... i am in the process of doing so...
so my dearest lesbian girlfriend pls be patient for nw.. hehehe

fun!

The past two days (22/5/07) and (23/5/07) was fabulous! met up with most of my A'level friends, hanged out, bringing back memories of old times in college.. it was fun indeed..


A good friend of mine, Dharma is leaving to India next week for studies..
ALL THE BEST TO DHARMA!!


And another good friend of mine, Johno 's birthday was on the 23rd..
HAPPY 2oth BIRTHDAY TO JOHNO!!


*hopefully ill be able to get my hands on the pics soon to post them up..

suck the poison out...

something I noticed recently when by right I should have notice it a long time ago.. yeahh probably too blurr to notice.. we all have poisons in our life.. n these poisons comes in all types and forms, shapes and sizes, colours and textures..

the thing is.. all these poison has the same purpose though it comes with different features.. which is well (duhh) poison US or OUR LIVES.. each of us have our own poison.. like for some, its their cigarette/smoking... which poisons and could kill... for others, it could even be shopping, the opposite sex, their parent, friend..


poisonous in this sense means a threat or danger to oneself... which could lead to the poison harming oneself directly (such as the cigie) or indirectly (shopping,etc).. each individual has their own specific poison which is very unique and different from others.

the effect of poison could even kill oneself either physically, spiritually, mentally, emotionally or even a combination.

and if we really sit n look at out lives, we could easily identify these poisons.. and what "way" this poisons are affecting us.. and again, through examination, we can come through a conclusion that the poison is the main source of the problem(s) we face..


there is another category of poison which is probably the deadliest... "self-induced poison".. it has no or very minor outside source.. so, to kill this poison takes a lot more than the rest..

so what do we do??... GET RID OF THE POISON!! seriously... suck it out! poke it! do whatever it takes... some poison may leave a scar or an after effect... like my old poison, it still has its scar in me today... which has become a new poison to me and I have to constantly remind myself to fight it....


so Shal, fight it! Kill it! before it kills you!


the war has just begun....